I'm 17 and My boyfriends in the army...

I'm 17 and My boyfriends in the army...

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I'm 17 and My boyfriends in the army...
I'm 17 and i'm a junior in high school. My boyfriend and i are engaged. I love him very much more then anything else. He's 19 adn in the army, he's currently living in texas while in im RI. He's in the process of getting ready for iraq. I'm 10 weeks pregnant and he doesn't know if he wants me to keep it. He's scared that something will happen to him and he will leave me with out a husband and raising a baby on my own He also is scared to leave his child without a father. i want to keep the baby more then anything but think he relaly wants me to not have it. i dont know if i should keep it because i know he will regret it if i don't and i want this baby so bad. Im nervous nad confused i have no clue what i should do because that on top of tryin to graduate highschool and workin part time is all confusing and stressfull. 1 babiisteps
3/21/2007
this is very hard I dont believe in abortion though. If you had help from parents or family that would be better. Or even adoption you know best if you think you could raise a child at your age. I was the same age as you when i first got pregnant and if it wasnt for my mother i dont know what i would have done. I finished school and went on to go to college. You really need to look at how much support you are going to have and if you and your man plans on really staying together if you do then it would help you while he is gone. 2 iowasnowflake
3/22/2007
I love him with all my heart and i kno he feels the smae but its hard right now one minute he wants the baby then he doesnt and him being so far away is hard to know if i can trust him. He thinks it would be best to have an abortion because he doesnt want to miss out on his babies life. and my family isnt so understanding they both would most likely disown me and my biggest fear is my mans family hating me. im scared about him leavin me because the distance but he assurse me everynight he wants to be with me forever. im so confusd 3 babiisteps
3/22/2007
what about giving it up for adoption? There are many women out there that would love the chance to have a little one and cant so this would be like a gift to them if you really made up your mind you didnt want it. 4 iowasnowflake
3/24/2007
you'll be fine.. Your 17 and if you think your old to sex than you must be old enough to take care of a baby right? in some cases no.. but your almost done with high school..and he might not want the baby now but once that baby comes you most likely will feel different..its a great gift to be able to have children some people don't get that chance..think carefully about this..you say he's in the army, so he should be able to support the baby the army has great benefits when it comes to supporting one of there own.. if this helps my friend was 15 yrs old when she had her daughter it was hard but she finished school and she had a long way to go ..but whatever age you are its always hard to raise a family you could be 45 and have it tough...So please think about this..I'm pregant with my thrid and I'm 25 its hard but its also wonderful at the same time..You'll be ok..there's help out there:) good luck 5 cashjcubb
3/27/2007
Also remember YOU want this baby. 6 cashjcubb
3/27/2007
Honey, its like this. If YOU want this baby then you need to have this baby. It's about you and your baby. I know that sounds bad but that child is growing inside of you and you two are already starting a bond that is stronger than any other. When I first told my man that i was pregnant, he freaked out and told me he had to leave. i thought we were over and i was going to have to do it alone but at least i would have the love that bonds a mother and her child. turns out he was just scared and everything worked out. we are now married and expecting our baby in october. bottom line, if you want this, go for it. but abortion is never the way the to go. At least consider adoption. but seriously if this is what you want and it will make you happy and you feel that you having the baby and keeping the baby is the best decision for you , do it. he will come around. and if he chooses not to... well then you and the baby dont need him. 7 new mommy
4/1/2007
Honey, its like this. If YOU want this baby then you need to have this baby. It's about you and your baby. I know that sounds bad but that child is growing inside of you and you two are already starting a bond that is stronger than any other. When I first told my man that i was pregnant, he freaked out and told me he had to leave. i thought we were over and i was going to have to do it alone but at least i would have the love that bonds a mother and her child. turns out he was just scared and everything worked out. we are now married and expecting our baby in october. bottom line, if you want this, go for it. but abortion is never the way the to go. At least consider adoption. but seriously if this is what you want and it will make you happy and you feel that you having the baby and keeping the baby is the best decision for you , do it. he will come around. and if he chooses not to... well then you and the baby dont need him. 7 new mommy
4/1/2007
Last night i was talking to him and i had made an appointment to go through with it but i couldn't bring my self to go. No matter how sick i feel all the time and tired i still couldn't go and we talked about it and i was figuring i would go to my doctor and a counselor to see what would be best for me to do. He asked me if i had been having any pains in my stomache or if i gained weight and i said yes. he asked why i hadn't said anything about it to him and i told him that i didnt want to annoy him with stupid stuff that he wanted to go away. he told me that he has been having second thoughts about the whole thing and that he wants this baby so much he just doesn't want me to feel abandoned if he has to go to iraq and he wants me to make this decision for me and to do what i think is best because he hopes tha best for us, Me the baby and him. I'm just nervous that i'm going to make the wrong decision and disappoint everyone that i love and that is close to me. I told my best friend about my situation and she's pressuring me into getting an abortion and i'm so against it!!. 8 babiisteps
4/2/2007
hey im 17 and 28 wks pregnant my husband was stationed at fort hood and deployed before we found out.it was also a hard decision for me too i was really worried that i couldnt do it if i lost him and my family was kind of the same but when you get down to it the point is that you have to think about what you both really want. you have to think positively you have to think what if u get an abortion and he comes home and everythings fine are you going to regret that decision. you cant go through this deployment waiting for something to happen or thinking something is going to happen to him or you ll go crazy regardless of weither or not your pregnant. me and my husband are so happy he plans on comeing home for the birth and then a few months later he ll be home for good and were really happy with our decision. so i cant tell you what s right for you i just want you to know that it can be done and the army provided excellent support for mothers in every situation ( widowed, single, deployed husbands, and when your spouse is with you as well) so please dont think you dont have any options cause you do. and your family will love you no matter what thats why their your family but if you decide to abort they might not understand your decision especially if they want to believe hes gonna be ok. so i hope it all works out for you!best of luck 9 brittmissingu
4/5/2007
The thing is he's just my boyfriend he's not my husband and yeah we both want to get married right after i turn 18 but he might be in iraq then. And i know he really wants this cause we have talked about it alot and we even took a little break to think if this is right for our life and I'm just scared i cant do this i know how my family is and i'm the middle child with my moms and the oldest for my dad and they won't understand my mom will put me through guilt and say that i'm just like she was when i'm really not. My dad will tell me i'm a screw up and i just want a way of reassurance that if i do go thru with this then everything will be okay and my family will be there to support me. I'm so scared i just think that it would be easier to act like this didn't happen but i know i can't just take the easy way out and maybe ruin both our lives. But what if haveing the baby ruins our life? 10 babiisteps
4/10/2007
I'm keepin my baby its all been decided im just scared to tell my parents. and my boyfriend propsed but now theres a slight problem.. He likes the name Jordan for a boy and so do i ALOT but he like the names Destiny and Stacie for girls and i don't I like Rebecca and Elizabeth but he wont change his mind and we had made an agreement that he can choose the first name but i can choose the middle name but i dont want a child named Destiny or Stacie!!!! I need so much help!! 11 babiisteps
4/13/2007
he talked to his mom and he don't want it but i don't have the money to get rid of it now and i want it but i don't know what to do. 12 babiisteps
4/18/2007
"IT" is a precious life growing inside of you - a baby human. Hope I don't come across as too judgemental, but it seems to me that you are too young to raise a child. If your boyfriend's mind changing can change your mind as easily as it seems to, then raising a child is not the best option for you right now. Go through with the pregnancy instead of killing this baby growing inside of you. Give it to a family who will love him/her and nurture your child for the rest of their life. You will regret murdering your child every day of your life if you go through with an abortion. If you do decide to keep your baby, know that there is MUCH work involved - only the least of which will be sleepless nights. Your entire life will change 180 degrees. No longer will you be able to focus exclusively on yourself and your boyfriend - your child's welfare will have to be included in every decision that you make. A newborn is 100% dependant on you to give him/her the love, comfort and basic needs that they deserve, and if you are unsure that you can do this completely, then your best option is to find a loving family who can. 13 mom of 2
4/20/2007
If you want this baby have it dont let a man make the choice for you because if you really want it and you have an abortion you will regret it for the rest of your life and i have heard that abortion to lead to problems having kids in the future. It may be hard but i did it and i know if i can anyone can. if u boyfriend doesnt think its a good idea maybe its for other reasons like he doesnt want the responsibility but thats not a reason for abortion. 14 hottmomma07
4/21/2007
Some tiems its really hard for a man to understand that being pregnant is more then later Your going to have a baby, but that You already have the baby growingi n side of You. I have lost three pregnancys to miscarriages. And my husband has told me that he can't posably now how much its hurts at times because he wasn't the one caring the babies.- ; Even tho he(Your bf) cares so much about You he can't opsibley know what it is to be a mother, or a mother-to-be, and shouldn't be the one to make the discission for You to have an abortian. ; Im agenst having abotians but its not my place to makes Your discission, but do not go in to with any question on if You want to keep the baby, and do not leave any questians You have unancered, it may haunt You till You die. Keep in mind abortian clinics don't have in mind what a mother will go threw aftore the abortian, they numb them self to it. thay have a job to do, and try their best not to have their feelings combine with their work.(my aunt used to work in a clinic) so please do look out side the abortian clinic for all Your ancers. I hope very much You don't stress out to much over Your discission. and i hope very much You have suport from friends and family. 15 Sushi
4/25/2007
I cry lik everynight i want my baby. I want to tell my mom and i dont even care if my bf doesn't want part in it or if he does. I want to be strong and be willing to do this. My bf's mom is the reason im getting rid of my baby and it hurts so much because she is always tryin to make jokes about it lik the $650 to get rid of it if my medical won't cover it is Nothing compared to being stuck with a baby for the rest of yur life. she even told me how if she could she wouldn't have her kids and i just wanted to walk out and have nothing to ever do with them again. My appt is thurs and i can barely think about anything else besides how much im goin to hate myself when i do this. but at the same time i feel like its too late. And im doin all this with no support or help and without my parents knowing at all. I had to go to court and get a bypass and everything. I kno its crazy that i want to keep my baby but i do and i don't kno how to change that. One of my friends is havin an aboriton friday and she is only 10 weeks but they think im about 14 and mines takin all day hers isn't and her mom is takin her out to lunch after. I just want proof that i should keep my baby . lik i feel lik the reason my first 4 appt were cancelled was cause i shouldn't get it done. But im to scared to tell anyone i don't wanna go thru with it. I want to keep my baby but feel like i don't have the option!!!! 16 babiisteps
5/8/2007
Hey hun, Please don't think that abortion is your only hope. There are two other options. Parenting and adoption. There are several places that I know of that will allow pregnant women to live regardless of whether they choose to parent or allow a couple to adopt their child. Please think about what you are saying. YOU don't want to abort the baby.... That is YOUR decision. No one can make you. Yes, they can make is hard on you, but they can't make you. If you ever wanna talk e-mail me 17 danyelle
5/9/2007
I'm much older than you but I was in your spot at one time. They found a major heart problem one the 1st ultra sound. They said she was to be born dead. I had a little over a week to decide if I wanted to have abortion. Let me tell you every person inclueding my parnet and brother wanted me to have one. She was to be born dead but my heart said I coundn't do that. I wanted her with all my heart and I had one freind that said what does your heart say. even the spemdoner I call him didnt want her. His mom and grand-mom wish my baby dead. So I packed up and moved back to Oh. She was 5 months and 2 days when she died. So I ask you and only because you are caring the baby. WHAT DOES YOUR HEART SAY TO YOU. I was always told to go with my heart. It's 11 yrs. now and I want another baby so bad but I'm single.I know I wrote alot I'm sorry about that. I have not really talked about my daughter in very long timeHope you can find peace. A Freind in Ohio Valerie 18 MadelynMay
5/17/2007
sweet heart i know almost what your going threw and they are right with the help of family and friends it gets better... i know how it goes i am 15 and pregnant with an army baby.. but i decided that if i was old enough to have sex then i should except the responseablities that come with that.. i mean being pregnant is hard and diffacult to cope with.. but i will be a single motther cause i made the mastake of thinking he would be there.. but i am not tring to stear you in one certin direction cause being pregnant and realizing that i will be doing this alone is hard and to throw my age and school on top of that gets harder but it has its ups to.. well i just thought i would put an opion out there... i wish you luck "Pround mommy " 19 proudmommy15
5/23/2007
im 21 and im 8 months pregnant. the father of my baby is in the marine corps. i live in ohio and he is stationed in north carolina. its rough. especially deployments, but trust me, the way i look at it is if something does happen to him, at least youll have a little part of him for the rest of your life. and if he puts you on his beneficeary policy, then you and the baby would be more than taken care of in the event of his death. dont end a precious little life. if something does happen to him at least youll always have his son or daughter. 20 marineluvingrl
6/28/2007
Anyone has a boyfriend/ HUSBAND whos in the army?????????i really need ur ADVICE A.S.A.P 21 Bennettslove
12/11/2007
I'm 21 and I have a 2 1/2 year old daughter with my husband. I also have a 5 1/2 year old son, who I choose adoption for when I was only 15. I don't believe in abortion. Everything happens for a reason, maybe your baby is a blessing for your boyfriend and you. If you believe in God, then there's your answer... PRAY and you'll find comfort in whatever choice you make. I think it is only fair to give your unborn child a chance at life. 22 Nicks0219
1/12/2008
i am 17 and 14 weeks pregnant and i am really scared. i was supposed to be starting pitcher for the varsity softball team this year and i just let everyone down, but i was seriously thinking about getting an abortion. but then i saw a baby neice and thought there is no way i could ever do that to a baby, my boyfriend even wanted me to get an abortion but when we went to my first altasound everything changed, i am so glad that i decided to keep the baby. i think u should keep it because if u dont u are going to regret it down the road. 23 Rachum09
1/16/2008
i have a boyfriend in the army. im sure we may have some of the same questions 24 Ga_Girl
2/26/2008
well i know how you feel because i am also pregnant 10 weeks and my boyfriend is in the army and he is 18 but the only difference is he wants to get married already because the army takes care of you and makes sure you and your baby are fine i dont believe in abortions you should really talk to your boyfriend about it i mean yea it sucks that the father of your child could pass away but than you will regret not having ur child becaus he or she is a little piece of your boyfriend and will always remind you of him 25 j&m
6/24/2008
same here i dont believe in havin a aborption,, u should have the baby cuz if somethin did happen to him you would have family to help you... and jus explain to ur lil one why her or his dad is not around if somethin happened.... but what if somethin dont happen and he gets to come back he will have a kid and u to look forward to when he gets home.... 26 Mommy of 3
7/22/2008
i wouldnt keep the child. im your age & my bfs the same age and going in to the army. Rasing the baby your selfs gonna be reall hard & if something were to happen to its father it would grow up with out one. i got the abortion only because of the fact the baby may not have a father if something were to happen & even if something didnt happen, youd be on your own for a while b.c hes away & might be away for a long time. if he loves you & you love him, when he comes home start new and have a baby to raise it together :] & live happy. 27 kaylaaa
1/14/2010
Keep the baby. God forbid that something happens to your husband, but the best thing for you to do is to have some small part of him left; like your baby. It will be hard if he does die, but still, keep the baby. 28 kat14
1/20/2010
Well im 17 I turn 18 in june. My boyfriend is 17 and he joined the army he is leaving in Aug for Georgia for Boot camp. Im nervous I wanna be with him forever and he has 4 years of active duty. I really want a baby..but the same time I dont want too be a single parent. A child needs two parents (mom & dad) I wanna make my parents grandparents! I want too make my grandma a great grandma! I have so many different generations of cousins and I really want a baby! 29 Leandra
1/23/2011

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I'm 17 and My boyfriends in the army...