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Oh GOD!!! I wish there was a way.. |
| I heard a story about a Brazilian woman who lost her life and gave birth to two twins as she was on life support and brain dead. I am suffering from a similar heart disease. It is risky if I conceive. I was okay and up for it despite the risk. My husband is more in opposition ever since that story became viral. Is it necessary that I will meet the same fate? I mean the risk is risk there are chances of survival too. I don't want to die without even knowing what motherhood is. How do I convince him?
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Vanilla86
10/30/2017 |
| That is so sad to hear. I remember being so shocked when I heard about that woman on the news. It was astounding to see the lengths that women can go to in order to have children. I mean I fully understand that she wanted to have children, but I don’t think she thought it through. Just like you aren’t. You say that you want to experience motherhood. Well, my question is, how will you do that if you don’t make it out okay? What will happen to the baby you leave behind? Remember that there are other options available to you. Surrogacy is a promising option. As is adoption. Both of these options pose significantly less risk. Moreover, they will allow you to experience motherhood. All without putting your own life in danger.
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Kato
11/3/2017 |
| Oh God, my dear. Please don’t put yourself in danger. Your life and health should be our priority. I can understand why you so want children. Motherhood is a blessing, but it shouldn’t be so costly. Your husband is absolutely right. The best path to take right now is to consult doctors. Both a cardiologist and a gynecologist. Proceed with trying to conceive only if both specialists give you the green light. If either of them thinks it might be too risky, then just don’t do it. There are other ways to have children. Don’t throw away your life for a lost cause. Consider surrogacy or adoption. Many couples have managed to complete their families with these options. Whatever you do, just be careful!
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Zion
11/3/2017 |
| Forgive me if I am mistaken, but what you are thinking of is totally unreasonable. Your husband is right. I am glad to see that at least one of you is being rational. Children are important, but so is your health. Your life is the biggest blessing you have. Don’t just throw it away. Especially not for something that might not even work out. I would advise you to consult a specialist. A doctor preferably. They are the only ones who can provide you with the information and statistics you need. I would suggest that instead of trying to convince your husband for this, spend your time looking up other options. An adoption is a brilliant option. Not only will you have a child or more, but you will also be able to provide those children with a home who don’t have one. I hope you figure this out.
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Kerry
11/3/2017 |
| Forgive me if I am mistaken, but what you are thinking of is totally unreasonable. Your husband is right. I am glad to see that at least one of you is being rational. Children are important, but so is your health. Your life is the biggest blessing you have. Don’t just throw it away. Especially not for something that might not even work out. I would advise you to consult a specialist. A doctor preferably. They are the only ones who can provide you with the information and statistics you need. I would suggest that instead of trying to convince your husband for this, spend your time looking up other options. An adoption is a brilliant option. Not only will you have a child or more, but you will also be able to provide those children with a home who don’t have one. I hope you figure this out.
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jeemy
11/3/2017 |
| Hi honey. I really don’t see why you want to risk your life. Your life is important. Don’t just throw it away. You really won’t get to experience motherhood if something goes wrong with you during your pregnancy. Given your condition that is very likely. Today we have so many options available. You don’t need to be rash. Go for surrogacy instead. Or adoption can also help you have a child. Both of these options will allow you to experience motherhood without putting your life in danger. Another option can be to look for a cure for your heart disease first, but I am sure you must have tried that already. Your husband is absolutely right in opposing you on this issue. Good luck!
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Webber
11/3/2017 |
| Hello Vanilla, Do not convince him to have a baby through pregnancy. It would risk your life, darling. He loves you that is why he is not agreeing about trying for a baby. Let us suppose that you get pregnant. You managed to give birth to a baby. At the end, you lost your life. Can you imagine, how will your child survive without you? Your husband will become a single parent. There will be no one to whom your child can call mommy. This is exactly what your husband might be thinking. Due to this reason, he might not be agreeing to let you conceive. He is thinking of you, my dear. Although I have used bit harsh words just to make you understand how hard, life can be for your husband and baby without you. I hope you will understand me instead of taking me negatively. Try to understand the feelings of your husband.
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Chiseler
11/3/2017 |
| Hi dear, I really feel bad after reading about that women. I wonder how her babies will survive without her. It is going to be so tough for his husband as now he is a single parent. Children need both of the parents in their life. She would have never thought of that she will not be able to play with her kids. I think the story of that lady is advice for you. You want to risk your life for a baby. Have you ever thought if you had to face the same situation as that lady? I may sound rude to you but I am talking about the reality. You need to be realistic. You can have your baby through many other options. Adoption is one. If you don’t want to go for adoption, still you have the option of surrogacy. Many people who have been through the same situation as yours are now parents just because of the surrogacy procedure. I think you need to go for surrogacy instead of convincing your husband to try for pregnancy.
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Lambert
11/3/2017 |
| Listen, dear! You're thinking it in a really wrong way. Plus, your situation doesn't seem right. I think you should stop thinking like that. Plus, your husband's reservations and oppositions are extremely right. Your health isn't compatible to go on a pregnancy journey for now. Well, I'd suggest you few things in a case like yours. First of all, don't panic! You can become a mother. You can feel it by having a child through surrogacy. Just concentrate on your health and try recovering fast from this thing now; First things first! Don't decide your fate on other prejudices, it's not the right way. I wish you luck to get better soon. In the meantime, learn about surrogacy and try for it.
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Katherine
11/3/2017 |
| Listen, dear! You're thinking it in a really wrong way. Plus, your situation doesn't seem right. I think you should stop thinking like that. Plus, your husband's reservations and oppositions are extremely right. Your health isn't compatible to go on a pregnancy journey for now. Well, I'd suggest you few things in a case like yours. First of all, don't panic! You can become a mother. You can feel it by having a child through surrogacy. Just concentrate on your health and try recovering fast from this thing now; First things first! Don't decide your fate on other prejudices, it's not the right way. I wish you luck to get better soon. In the meantime, learn about surrogacy and try for it.
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Katherine
11/3/2017 |
| "Well, I think surrogacy then pretty much is the answer to your prayers. Over the years, the process of using a surrogate mother has become a way for parents to have a child by using a third party to carry the child until birth. You can definitely know and may as well enjoy your motherhood with a surrogate baby. I have heard that to everyone who can afford it, doctors strongly recommend surrogacy over any other alternative. If you haven't already, I'd recommend that you do a little research on your own on about surrogacy and gather all the info possible online. Don't just stop there. Arrange for a consultation with the specialists and see what they have to say.
Also, surrogacy can be pretty economical if you select the right clinic. Mostly, the centers in the US are expensive. Many find clinics outside US (especially in Europe) to be far better in service as well in procedure fees."
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Nicholson
11/3/2017 |
| Hi Vanilla. I hope you are feeling better now. I feel very sorry for your condition. The disease you are having is very rare and I think there is a lot of risk in it if you try to conceive even after knowing the consequences. You are right that there are chances of survival also if you try to have a baby in this condition but you need to think about the odds too. Your husband is totally right. Your life is his first priority and you are very lucky that you have found such a loving and caring husband. You should look for other options to become a mother. Your main goal is to have children and a complete family so why don’t you go for surrogacy. You can become a mother through surrogacy without risking your life. It is the easiest way to become parents. I have seen a lot of women who have now their own children without getting pregnant and it was all possible because of surrogacy. Think this process is new to you but no problem I can help you with that. You first need to discuss this matter with your husband. I think he will agree on this and your problem will be solved. Meanwhile, you take good care of yourself and try not to take any sort of stress. I know about a few experiences related to surrogacy and I can help you with it. But first, you need to make a decision by yourself. Don’t hesitate to ask more help anytime you want to. Take care.
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Hawkeyes
11/3/2017 |
| Hi Vanilla. I hope you are feeling better now. I feel very sorry for your condition. The disease you are having is very rare and I think there is a lot of risk in it if you try to conceive even after knowing the consequences. You are right that there are chances of survival also if you try to have a baby in this condition but you need to think about the odds too. Your husband is totally right. Your life is his first priority and you are very lucky that you have found such a loving and caring husband. You should look for other options to become a mother. Your main goal is to have children and a complete family so why don’t you go for surrogacy. You can become a mother through surrogacy without risking your life. It is the easiest way to become parents. I have seen a lot of women who have now their own children without getting pregnant and it was all possible because of surrogacy. Think this process is new to you but no problem I can help you with that. You first need to discuss this matter with your husband. I think he will agree on this and your problem will be solved. Meanwhile, you take good care of yourself and try not to take any sort of stress. I know about a few experiences related to surrogacy and I can help you with it. But first, you need to make a decision by yourself. Don’t hesitate to ask more help anytime you want to. Take care.
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Matilda
11/3/2017 |
| Oh dear! Your post made me so upset. You are going through the most difficult phase of your life and I can feel that it is very difficult for you to cope with all this situation. I don’t have the words to say to you about your problem. To be a mother is a dream of every woman and that dream is shattered when a woman can never become a mother. According to your condition, I will also suggest you that you should never try to conceive until and unless your doctors allow you to do so. You should first try to get rid of this disease by having a proper treatment. I hope there will be some way for you to get cured of this disease. If not then you still don’t need to worry. Your husband loves you a lot and he does not want to lose you. You should also think about his feelings for you. If something happens to you then he will have to pay for the rest of his life and I think you don’t want to do that to him. I know you want to be a mother and feel that how it is to be a mother. You have a few other options to deal with your situation. Surrogacy is the best option for you. You will not have to get pregnant for it as a surrogate mother will carry your child and after the proper time period, you will have your baby from her. You will then be a mother and your husband will also become a father. If you have queries about the process I can tell you all the information in detail. Your husband will also be convinced of this very easily as there will be no risk involved in it. Tell me when you have made a final decision. Keep posting.
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McCarty
11/3/2017 |
| Hi dear, ups and downs are a part of everyone’s life and everyone should behave bravely to face such conditions in their life. It is the fate that decides for us and I think the fate has also decided it for you that you cannot become a mother and if you try to do so you can lose your life. It’s a lot of pain to bear when you know you can never have a child. I can feel your pain because I also have a similar condition. I was diagnosed with a heart disease known as Mitral stenosis after the first year of my marriage. The doctor told me that if I will try to have a baby, I will put my and baby’s life at risk. We both can die or either one of us will survive. I told this to my husband. He was also very upset. After some time I asked him that I want to try for a baby but he straight away refused. He wants me to be healthy and enjoy a happy life with him. He says that we will have a baby someday if it is our fate. It’s been three years now that I have been having my treatment but still no success. I started to search for other options to have a baby and I finally found about surrogacy. I suggest you also to go for it. It is a very reliable procedure to have a baby. You will have a surrogate mother to carry your child and you will not have to worry about a thing. My husband has agreed to it if my treatment does no good I the coming years. I want you to discuss it with your husband. Let me know if I can be of some more help. I am always here for you.
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McFarland
11/3/2017 |
| Oh God! You shouldn't think like that. It was her fate, why would it happen to you? Well! First of all. I'd really like you to look upon your health condition. As If it's severe, you should consult with your OB before getting any step toward pregnancy. Your husband's concern is also clear and right! His opposition is fine as your health conditions don't seem fine. You should put it like that. I know how badly some woman would desire motherhood. Your reservations are true. But, you can be a mother by other ways! If you can't conceive normally...You don't need to convince him. Just try searching for other options like surrogacy or adoption...They are really common for women having infertility...Rest! I wish you a better and healthy life. GWS!
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Eliza
11/3/2017 |
| "But of course, there is a way...
Hi there,
Juno here. I'm sorry to hear about your heart disease. I'm sure your doc will get you out of that soon.
About the pregnancy - it's best to not get conceived yourself when you have a chronic disease. Risking your odds against something with mere possibility that you may see the little man you just brought into the world is not a wise thing to do and hence not recommended.
Instead of convincing your partner, you should try to convince yourself to subscribe to the view of alternatives. One great alternative which appears to be a thing these days is surrogacy.
With surrogacy, you can still have your own biological child. The only difference is that you will be renting the womb of another female (often called Surrogate Mother - SM) to give birth your child.
In case you are interested in surrogacy, I can provide you details of a clinic in Ukraine that I've heard is the best in the world.
Let me know when you have made up your mind.
"
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Elizabeth
11/3/2017 |
| "I pray that you do not just see your motherhood but live with it, honey.
Like the other lady commented, there ARE ways to enjoy motherhood. One typical is adoption; I, however, personally like surrogacy as an alternative to natural pregnancy.
Though it's a bit new in the market, the rate of success is surprisingly comforting to notice.
I must say that you should NOT risk your life with TTC. I appreciate your partner as he's doing great by not agreeing with what you are talking him into. You really need to do a little research on surrogate babies if you don't already know about"
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Whitney
11/3/2017 |
